In preparation for next week’s draft, I wanted to make things as simple as possible for all you die-hards ready to sound off after the first pick.

As soon as the pick comes in, the comment sections will start blowing up. Some of you will be busy (or too drunk) to think of a comment on your own. That in mind, I have assembled some comments for you to cut-and-paste immediately following the first pick. They are broken down by personality, so just find yours, hit copy, and let her rip.

The Other Teamer

Profile:

You are a rival fan, shortly after your team picked up a big time name the Packers passed on. This is a great comment if you are browsing the comment sections of the other teams in the division. Since you will only be leaving one comment and never returning, this should suffice as a timeless piece for all websites you visit.

CUT AND PASTE

“I can’t believe ol’ Teddy passed on (insert big name here) for (insert unknown draft pick here). I hope you like seeing Aaron Rogers on his butt all season. Way to go FUDGEPACKERS!!!”

The Analyzer

Profile:

Every comment you leave is well thought out and in your eyes perfect. You know what you’re talking about and your comments are often twice as long as the actual article. You live for discussion, and are always armed with the facts.

CUT AND PASTE

“I really understand your frustration at this point, but you see, if you would have gone back to (insert popular sports writer link here)’s article, you would notice (and I would know) that your logic is completely inconsistent. Here are some of the details of Ted’s thought process in the situation and I’ll fill you in a little bit on some of the finer…”

Favre Guys

Profile:

Um… yeah, I think this is pretty self-explanatory.

CUT AND PASTE

“Ted Thompson would not have needed to make this move if he had treated a legend like he should have been. Brett Favre didn’t need good players around him, that’s why he was BRETT FAVRE. I still can’t believe Thompson treated him this way, and I hope Mr. 6-10 likes being unemployed.”

The Realist

Profile:

You see everything in hindsight, and want people to know that you can never judge a book by its cover.

CUT AND PASTE

“I see all you armchair quarterbacks are judging this pick already. Come on. Isn’t it a little bit early to start calling winners and losers? No one thought that Donald Driver was going to be anything when he got picked either. Look how that turned out.”

The Spammer

Profile:

Unknown

CUT AND PASTE

"Real Casino Guide Here
real casino guide
real acsino ugide
real casino guide
rael casinno uide
real casion guide
realcasino ugider
real caqsino guide
real casino guide
rel casino guide
real csaino ugide
real casino ugide
rsal casiino guide
real casino guide
http://bare.realcasinoguide4u.com/proven/real-casino-guide.htm
http://discover.realcasinoguide4u.com/love/guaranteeexpensive/real-casin..."

The Secret Agent

Profile:

You are here for one reason and one reason only, to have the last word. You may wait around until most of the argument has died down, just do you can leave that one comment that will undoubtedly change the course of history.

CUT AND PASTE

“your a $&#%”

The Troll

Profile:

No definition needed

CUT AND PASTE

“TED THOMPSON SUCKS #$%^@!!!! HAVE FUN ENJOYING ANOTHER SEASON WITH LOOSER TIGHTWAD TEDDY. TED THOMPSON EATS #$&%2 TED THOMPSON EATS #$%^#

The I’ve Been Saying This For Years Guy

You aren’t surprised at all. You have been trying to tell us this was coming all along. You know more, watch more, and are just generally smarter than everyone else.

CUT AND PASTE

“I think I’ve been pretty clear on my support of Thompson and his method of building his roster. Go look at my (enter post) from the other day. I’ve been saying along that I think we should be take (insert draft pick here). He is a great addition, and definitely Packer people”

The We Should Have Traded For Peppers Guy

Profile:

You have said it from the start of the off-season. Julius Peppers should be a Green Bay Packer at any cost. You waited for this moment in hopes that Ted Thompson would actually make a blockbuster trade for a quality player.

CUT AND PASTE

“This is total bull. Once again Ted Thompson shows that he is afraid to make a splash outside of the draft. We easily could have taken this pick and perhaps a third, and traded to Carolina for Peppers a PROVEN player instead of taking a gamble on somebody who never has taken a snap in the NFL. We could have had Moss too. Can you imagine Moss and Peppers? This team would be unstoppable."

The Defender

Profile:

You will go to any lengths to defend Ted Thompson. It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks or says, Ted Thompson has made the right decision.

“I’d like to see you do any better. Ted Thompson has stuck to his philosophy and put together a solid team of players. So put your reservations aside. Acknowledge the good things Ted Thompson has done and hope he repeats those performances. Don’t hope to be “wrong” and have Ted do well. Root for him and hope to be “right!”

Did I miss any?

(Stay Tuned)